


Can't Stop Thinking About You

by becasoras



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Cheating, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-16
Updated: 2020-05-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:54:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24214003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/becasoras/pseuds/becasoras
Summary: He saw her and fell in love, suddenly believing in love at first sight, but his brother wants her and he has to step aside and watch as they fall for each other. He wonders what would've happened if he had never left, never introduced them, what could've been?
Relationships: Edward Cullen/Bella Swan, Jasper Hale/Bella Swan
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

Hi! Little authors note here, first let me just clarify, this is fanfiction and I try my best to be historically accurate and stay true to the original story, but remember, there will be some mistakes, I'm human, but just remember this is fiction and just go along with it, it's part of the story that I'm writing. I live for your reviews, but please don't go crazy if there's a few mistakes! Thank you and enjoy :)

-Becasoras

We had only been in this small, lifeless town for about a year and were starting school up all over again, I hated this, it got so repetitive, I was a soldier, not some little teenager, I fought in the Civil War of America just to ignore the civil war among these petty high schoolers I sat with for seven hours a day. I just wanted to run away, I felt so out of touch in my family, I was the only one with any special powers among them other than Emmetts super strength, I felt like an outcast being the empath and these teenage's extreme emotions hurt my dead brain. Life was meaningless, even the attraction to my wife of almost a hundred years was fading quickly, but no one knew. I was becoming a robot and I couldn't escape because they were the only people I've known since being a vampire other than Peter and Charlotte, but I wouldn't want to third wheel on left me with one option, stay with my, 'family' and pretend to love someone who was now a stranger to me. We may have thought that we were mates in the beginning, but now there is nothing between us and I think we were better off as a fling.

After almost an hour of anxiety filled rooting through my closet, I decided to wear some nice black jeans, some black army boots, and a deep forest green v neck shirt. This was one of my favorite outfits to wear just because the green brought out my eyes and the boots made my look badass, the only thing was, I could never wear it in Phoenix, I guess that was one of the perks to living with Charlie. I put on a silver anchor necklace and went to style my hair, but instead left it down naturally, I liked the way the subtle waves of my ebony hair seemed to clash against my deathly pale skin. I chuckled, thinking of how I lived in Phoenix almost my entire life, but still looked like a ghost, but at least not I'd fit in. I grabbed my backpack and walked out to my rusty old truck that sounded like a roar when you started it that sscared birds away. Idrove in silence, wishing that Charlie would get my a modern stereo for my birthday this year, I loved my music, especially in the car, but it was all on an IPod and the car technology was closer to the stone age than now. I rolled into the parking lot, thirty minutes early for my first day of tenth grade, wow, I thought, so exciting, all of this was obviously sarcastic, I thought high schoolers were immature and stupid, but then again, I had the mind of a middle age woman. I guess because I had been taking care of my mom my entire life I had no time to be a teenager because I was the parents, so I wasn't really into anything other high schoolers were like drinking and drugs, I just wanted to be done with all of it. I got out after a small moment of contemplation about everything around me, my eyes sweeping the almost empty parking lot for the main office. It was september yet I had to put on my dark leather jacket, I wondered how cold it could get, but this was probably because the sun only came out at most for a week and that was in June, so you can imagine what affect that has on the climate. When I walked in I was instantaneously warmer so I took off my jacket once more and walked up to the conservative looking lady behind the desk, who I assume is holding schedule.

"Hello." She said in a high voice that didn't match the clouds outside.

"Hello, I'm Bella Swan and I'm here for my schedule." Her eyes lit up with recognition at my last name, sometimes I hated just how small this town really was.

"Ah! You're the chief's daughter, I've been waiting for you." She mumbled about how great my father was and whatnot until I saw her take out a piece of paper (I'm assuming was my schedule) and she suddenly fell silent and raised her eyebrows.

"Wow, Ms. Swan! I see that you have mostly AP classes, I'm impressed, I've never seen anyone at this school, who is your age and in the college level class. You're a smart cookie!" I cringed slightly at the word that hasn't been used to describe me since the third grade and politely accepted my schedule, leaving without another word. I have Math first, great, I might have to switch that around because my mind in still dead in the morning, so I liked to have subjects like English that can wake up my brain, but not over work it. If there is anything I stand by it is that high schoolers are love struck, failures of the future, but I'm determined to not be like that and actually learn something instead of just chasing boys all day.

One thing I hated about my vampirism is the lust in everyone's eyes when they look at me, like I'm just some kind of meat for them to try their hand at. So far, I haven't seen anyone who even makes me look twice, everyone here is average looking, dull, and shallow, not to mention stupid, I surprised most of them can even pass to the next grade. Still, as I walk down the hall with my brothers, they stare, we're all aa good looking bunch and they know Emmett is dating Rose and some people are intimidated by his muscles, but I don't get why they don't stare at Edward more. He's the one who's actually single, but, not to sound conceited, Edward looks like a bit of a creep and despite everyone in the school thinking I'm some kind of serial killer. These crowds are dull and are always trying to some at all of us, but we always shoot them down, I will never fall for a human, they're all just so… weak.

I go through the entire day being hit on by various guy and girls of various ages (even a professor, ew) but I don't give them or their teenage drama a second glance, it all just annoys me, at least at my other school people knew I wasn't up for the bait. Everyone here is just so plain and plain fades in, but I have heard some whispers in my classes about a family that's super rich and beautiful which had intrigued me, what could make a simple town like this go sow wild it's the only thing they can talk about? During lunch I decided I don't need friends or human contact and sit far away from everyone else in a cluster of empty white tables. I only eat the things on my tray that don't look processed and ignore the rest, I'm very prideful about my figure and I don't want to mess it up, I've worked hard for it in these many years. I sometimes compare myself to a lioness, deadly and unmoving, full a pride and wit, I think that describes me and so I stick by it. To my displeasure some girl came and sat next to me, interrupting my train of thought, I looked at her and remembered that I had met her earlier, shallow and stupid, is what I had concluded so I don't why she was sitting by me.

"Hey, I'm Jessica, we met earlier." She said with fake kindness shining in her eyes.

"Yes, I remember." I shot her down, but it's not like it wasn't second nature to me already. She tried to keep up some kind of chatter, but I kept giving her one liners that I know so well. About halfway through lunch some people walked, and I must say, they were all beautiful. They all walked with grace, even the mountainous man which seemed impossible, but the probability of that many good looking people in this school was slim to none. They were all dull just like the rest except for one blond haired girl, but she seemed to be pretty close with the bodybuilder next to her. Jessica must've seen me staring because her eye lit up with a topic of conversation and for once, I was actually interested.

"Are those the Cullens?" I asked, looking at their shocking golden eyes, I've never seen anything like that before.

"Yup, they're all adopted brothers and sisters, their parents are Carlisle and Esme Cullen, Carlisle is the doctor and they're LOADED. It's kind of weird, most of them are dating each other except for one, but I guess since they're not related it's okay. One of the guys isn't here today, I wonder why?" She continued to tell me all about the family and I had a fun time filtering out the facts from the gossip. By the end, however, I wanted to know even more, they were my new problem and I wanted to figure them out, the only problem was that they were all social recluses.

The emotions had overwhelmed me once more and I had to go home before lunch, well, at least that's what I told the rest of my siblings. In all truth I had left to smoke, it's weird, I started smoking when I was fifteen in Texas and even as a vampire I haven't been able to stop, even if it doesn't affect me anymore. I remember how alienated I felt among the perfect vegetarian vampires, so I told them I had stopped the habit, but truly I just smoked when I wasn't around them and no one knew that I had never changed. I liked being a vegetarian, but not all the time, I think a balance is the strongest way to control your thirst, but they won't listen to me thinking I'm just a bloodthirsty monster. I sighed, no one will ever understand me, how do I even know I have a mate?

Homecoming was coming quickly and I didn't really want to go, but for some reason, I felt a pull, but I think it was just from Charlie pushing me. I think he wanted me to make friends and be overjoyed with the world, he even gave me money for a dress, well, more than enough money. I decided I'd be simple this year and just picked a sleeveless black dress that cut off half way up my thigh paired with some cute black heels and that's it. I looked like I could be attending a funeral, but I didn't really care as I climbed into my large truck and rode off into the night.

Unlike our first homecoming last year, this year Alice was making me go along with all my siblings. I don't know why, she knows I don't really like to dance, but then again, I've only ever danced with Alice and she always wants to show off, having me twirl her around and throw her into the air. I sighed as I tied up my tie in the mirror, I thought back to my years as a general and almost wished I was back in the war and not getting all dressed up to show off, I guess they didn't know that if you have money you don't have to look rich.

"Come on Jazz, we're going to be late!" Alice yelled, coming out in a short dress, if I actually cared, I wouldn't let her go out in it, but I really didn't. I finished my tie and she grabbed my hand, dragging me out to the brand new Porsche Edward got her, I swear, sometimes they look more like mates then we do. She let me drive thankfully, I love driving, but all I have are motorcycles that Alice hates, they remind me of actual horses and it's kind of comforting. I start the car and if the tail lights didn't flick on, I wouldn't have known the Porsche was on, there's always something about sports cars that make them dead silent in an almost snake-like way.

I arrived at homecoming, not in a carriage like Cinderella, but my car did draw eyes like always. When I stopped, everything was so silent except for the blaring music inside, and before I got out of my truck I thought about just not going, but then Charlie popped into my head and he gilt tripped me into getting out and so I did. I looked around and to my surprise, the Cullens were here, I could tell because they had overly pricey sports cars sitting next to the average ones, maybe their other brother is here, the one I only heard of so far, at the moment I considered him a myth, but you never know. Cute couples were getting their pictures taken outside in front of a backdrop and I tried to walk around them the best I could seeing as that was the only way in. I'm guessing I was late by the lack of line afterwards, but I didn't care, the less time here, the better. When I walked in, I couldn't help but roll my eyes, thinking about how stereotypical homecoming was, the girls dancing with their dates, the guys waiting for it all to be over so the you'll get some, it was the epitome of teenage life. I walked around, hiding my face so I wouldn't be seen, I knew how to dance, but I didn't really like to and interacting with other people just seemed awkward and painful.

When she walked in, my heart started to dance. I'm sure no one noticed, seeing as Alice was too busy talking to Rose and the other two had ran off. Who was this girl? I thought, I had never seen her before, but taking a deep breath, I reconsider her scent around the school. She was beautiful, with deep, dark hair and forest green eyes, she was like a mystery I longed to look into. I could feel her emotions, uncomfortable, and I knew if anyone tried to approach her, she'd shoot them down, but that didn't stop me from walking up to her when the others had gone away. I didn't walk up to her directly, I leaned on the wall next to her, I could feel her unease grow, but there was also curious it's so I considered it safe.

"Hello, I don't believe we've met before, I'm Jasper Cullen." I said addressing the strange girl directly, holding out my hand.

"Bella." She said, taking my hand, not noticing the unusual temperature. Bella, what a lovely name. Her voice was deep, but like velvet to the ears, and all I wanted was to here her talk more. "I've heard about you."

"Really?" I asked, leading her on.

"Well, it seems that everyone in school loves to talk about you, but I've only heard bits and pieces, I'm not really into gossip." We talked more and I couldn't help but fall in love, compared to everyone else I had met, she's a rare flower in the desert, with a exotic appearance and intelligent eyes, she was perfect. Once I felt her becoming more and more comfortable with me, I even asked her to dance, and to my pleasure, she accepted. Unlike the clumsy, offbeat people around us, she was an excellent dancer, moving with grace to my every step.

"I'm surprised at how good of a dancer you are." I said, breaking the silence.

"I used to dance all the time, but I stopped when I moved here." She said, with a bit of sadness in her enrapturing voice. We danced a bit more as I observed her every action and emotion in a way only an empath could.

"Bella, you seem to me as if you've never been satisfied." I said as I twirled her around, her eyebrows knitted together, her mood turning from content to appalled

"I beg your pardon."

"Well, you're like me, I've never been satisfied with anything or anyone in my life." No reply. We stopped after just one more song and we said our goodbyes, after which I got to watch her walk away with heart breaking longing in my eyes that did not leave until I saw the rest of my siblings come over.

"What have you been doing Jazz?" Alice asked with a smile.

"Oh, just sitting here, wondering where you ran off to." I said, covering up my feelings with a fake smile.

"If we just decided to take a walk, that's all." We smiled and waited and I looked over at Edward, who was staring at something with intense lust in his eyes. I looked over and my heart shrivels up into nothingness, he was looking over at Bella. He loved her and I knew I had to step over and let him have her, I was married and they may be mates, I couldn't just upset my family order by cheating on Alice! I knew what I had to do. I walked over to her, tapping her on the back she looked at me with a brilliant smile on her face.

"Jasper?" She asked as I put on a pained, but convincing smile.

"Bella, there's someone I would like you to meet."

"Oh?"

"Follow me." I drug her through the crowd, regretting my every step, but never slowing down until we got to Edward.

"Bella, this is my brother Edward." Edward was surprised to say the least, but I could feel his pleasure.

"Hello." He said in his mysterious, deep voice that he only used around girls, I had to physically hold myself back from rolling my eyes.

"Hello, it's nice to meet you." She said, shaking his hand.

"I'll just let you two talk." I said and turned my back and walked over to Alice, if I were human, I'd be crying, but I still had tears of venom in my eyes, concealed by the dark lighting. I watched their affection grow for each other as the night progressed, the pain and regret in my heart growing by every pulse of love I felt from the couple. I tried focusing on Alice, not thinking about them, but my eyes always seemed to find themselves back to the happy couple in progress.

"Jazz, you seem distracted." Alice said, grabbing my hand and pulling my attention away from Bella and Edward.

"Really? I was watching Edward, making sure he's not making any mistakes." Alice laughed, she knew it sparked my love, but this time there was nothing, it was weird knowing someone you would've died for once was nothing to you anymore.

"Don't worry! I'm sure he won't, this is good for him, he needs some love in his life." She then dropped the subject and whisked me onto the dance floor to show off to the others. Alice and I really weren't compatible, she was competitive and loved to show off and I, on the other hand, was reserved and shy, we clashed a lot, but I just went with it. I left earlier just to get away from my heart break in progress to go and smoke a cigarette and get something to eat. Before I stepped out however, Bella and I shared a glance and I saw the happiness in her eyes and felt her love growing, but I still forced a smile onto my face and continued out.

Edward was amazing, I was surprised Jasper had even approached me, but I was still happy that he introduced Edward and I. We had planned a date next week and I felt like this was going to be the start of something great. When I got home I realised that I did actually have a fun time, something I really wasn't expecting, but I still told Charlie that it was dull just so he didn't get all smug knowing he was right.

When I got back to the house, everyone else was already there waiting for me and I knew there was going to be a family meeting. I rolled my eyes, I hate it when we have these, but it's required to keep the peace and understanding that we've had since we became a family.

"So, Edward, others have told me that you're interested in a human girl. You know this is forbidden." Carlisle, coming out with the big guns.

"But I love her, and I think she'll accept us as we are."

"Maybe, but what if she outs us, I don't want to break my heels running away from an angry mob, not again." Rosalie said, I would have laughed, but it wasn't the time.

"Well, ask Jasper why he introduced me to her, he clearly approves of us and that won't happen again." Edward defended and I internally sighed, why did he have to rat me out?

"How did you know he Jazz?" Alice asked in a sweet voice covering the suspicion in her voice, but I could still feel her emotions.

"She's knew and so I decided to go up to her and talk to her, nothing other than to look for Edward's mate." Alice didn't believe me, but let it pass for another time.

"Edward, do you think she's your mate?" Esme asked, hopeful, she really didn't like Edward being the black sheep of the family.

"Yes, I do." He said it with the utmost sincerity which broke my heart, if he says she's his mate then it must be.

"Well, then this is settled, she will fall in love with you and will later be turned once she knows about us." Carlisle said. It was over, everyone started to leave and I was devastated, I was happy my brother would have the love of his life, but people are selfish and I wanted her as my own, but I guess it was never meant to be.

"Where are you going Jazz?" Alice asked thinking I was off to meet some girl once more.

"I'm just going to go on a run." I said and left before she could offer to come with me. I ran and kept running until I was at a beach somewhere in Los Angeles. I looked up at the stars and broke down, screaming into the sky and throwing a cute little beach chair miles away. I fell to my knees pounded my fists on the soft sand with tears of venom in my eyes once more. My one shot at happiness and I gave it to my brother. I stopped throwing a tantrum after a bit, knowing that she would've never been able to love me if she was Edward's mate. I walked over to another one of those beach chairs and sat down in one, looking at the full moon, I lit a cigarette, thinking about my eternal life of unhappiness. I really didn't have a mate, I decided, I have been alive since the civil war yet I had never met her and so I decided that she never have and never will exist. Hopefully I'll die in battle like I've always wanted. I smoked three more and as I was on the last drag, the burning tip lighting up my somber face I decided if I left now no one would notice my absence. I sighed wondering what it would be like to just leave and never come back, I could even go live with Peter and Charlotte, but no, I had a family and I had to stand by them, even if it meant my own happiness. As I was running back I thought about Alice, she was my wife and I had to honor that, I couldn't cheat on her, she had helped me with so much, I couldn't destroy that…


	2. Chapter 2

Edward or Jacob. Jacob was great and all, a shifter wolf with a rocking body, but he was more about fun than being an intellectual, I already decided in my mind, but I didn't want to hurt him. Edward was mysterious and the fact that he could snap and kill me at any second was a bit thrilling, I know I was being stupid, but I also loved Edward and I couldn't just deny that to be with Jacob. Hopefully, Jake and I could still be friends after this. I was currently lying on the beautiful bed the Cullens had got for me in Edward's room thinking about everything when Edward walked in.

"Hey Bella?" He asked, looking a bit nervous which was unusual, he was normally calm and collected.

"Yes?" I asked, my brow knitting together in confusion.

"Well, I was thinking about how we're mates and we're going to be together forever and all that, also how you want to be turned, so, I have a proposal for you. I'll change you, but only if we get married first." I was shocked at the bluntness, but I couldn't refuse, the thought of being with Edward forever was so tempting I had to say yes.

"Okay." I said without hesitation.

"Really, okay. Here, I even brought the ring, it was my mother's." He slid it onto my hand and I jumped up, right into his arms, kissing him firmly on the lips.

"We have to tell everybody." A bit of anxiety rose up, but I calmed quickly, everything was going to be fine, we'd together, forever.

"Now?" I asked and he nodded. "Okay." He set me down and together we walked down the stair and told everybody who were overjoyed at news, well, everybody except Jasper he wasn't to excited, but he was happy and so I didn't pay any attention to it. There were hugs and immediately a day later the plan were being made. I was whisked away by Alice, Esme, and Rosalie to go shopping and the guys stayed home and started construction. Afterwards the invitations were getting sent out and Edward and the guys went to get their outfits for the wedding, it was all going perfectly. That was until Alice, Edward, Carlisle, Esme, and Emmett had to go to the Volturi to explain the situation to them/ It was only Rose, Jasper, and me inside the house and I was missing Edward, because of this the wedding would be pushed back a whole week for their trip and it was frustrating.

It was final, I know I thought it was final before, but now it really felt like there was no way I was going to have Bella for my own. They were getting married and with every flower I hung it felt like I was slipping deeper into an inescapable depression. I tried to shake it off, they were happy, but I couldn't help but love her and this was all my mistake. Everyone except for Bella and Rose were gone and it was harder to avoid the ring on my loves finger that seemed to be mocking me. I was outside, brooding once more, when I heard Bella's footsteps, I tried to plaster the fake smile on my face, but it was too late.

"Jasper, why are you so sad?" She asked and I had to be a quick thinker, I really hadn't got to talk to her like this in awhile, not since homecoming.

"Just missing Alice." I said, that's believable.

"Really? Because I'm pretty good at reading people and I've noticed you two have been growing apart lately…" My eyes grew wide, but I could help my heart flutter, she was so observant, I loved that.

"Well, you're not wrong, she doesn't trust me one bit, she always thinking I'm cheating on her whenever I want to be alone. I hate it."

"Well, have you ever cheated on her?" She asked, sitting down next to me.

"No, never, but I don't why I shouldn't. I don't love her anymore, but the girl I do love isn't available." I cursed myself, I said too much, she's going to figure it out!

"Then why don't you leave her and go tell the girl how you really feel?" Phew, she didn't see it.

"Well, because it would tear apart our family, they would feel the need to pick sides and I would have to leave, also I don't think the girl feels the same way anyway."

I felt a pull in my heart, and to my surprise, it toward Jasper. Edward was gone, he would never know… no, Rose was here and she would figure it out, also, I'm about to marry Edward, it would tear him apart if he knew I cheated.

"Well, because it would tear apart our family, they would feel the need to pick sides and I would have to leave, also I don't think the girl feels the same way anyway." Was Jasper talking about me? Did he feel the same way?

"Well, there's no shame in a .. secret love affair." I said, placing my hand on his knee. I didn't know what I was doing, but it felt so right. "I think she feels the same way to...' I left it and leaned in,smiling when I saw him follow suit. Our lips touched and it was like nothing I had ever experienced with anybody. The passion between the two of us was more than both Edward and Jake together and I now knew that I wasn't Edwards mate, not anymore. That was the last time I thought about Edward though, I was to focused on the man I making out with, the one I knew I loved.

"Rose." I said in between kisses and I felt Jasper nod. We broke apart, going back up to the house and getting on Jaspers motorcycle, driving until we got to Port Angeles. No one knew us here, we were safe. Jasper got a hotel room in cash and we ran through the halls holding hands and laughing like the teenagers we were, it was so thrilling. Jasper shoved me up against the door as he unlocked it, giving me another one of his kisses. We barely even thought of anyone else as we stumbled in, our lips stuck together as we kissed each other with equal passion, taking turns stripping off a piece of clothing between us.

"I've always loved you Bella." Jasper said as he laid me down on the bed, both of us completely naked.

"I can't believe I haven't noticed." I joked and we were back at it again...

As we slowed down our make out session stopped and it was just little kisses as I laid in Jaspers strong arms, feeling more at home then I ever had with Edward.

"I love you." I said, looking up at the ceiling above me.

"I love you to." We sat in silence for a few moments before I decided to get up and take a shower and I was almost done when Jasper decided to join me.

After a bit we went back home once more, telling Rose we were out at a movie or something and we went on our day as normal, as if we hadn't just had very passionate sex in a hotel a couple towns over. It was nice, but every day or night after we would sneak out to be with each other. On one of the last days before Edwards and then would come back, Jasper and I, like always, were in each other's arms after a very electric night, in complete silence.

"We could run away." Jasper said out of nowhere, shocking me.

"I can't." No matter what, I couldn't just leave Edward. "You said it yourself, it would destroy everyone and I don't want that to happen, this needs to stop. I'm getting married in two days and you've been married for almost a hundred years, this isn't right and you know it." Jasper sighed, sitting up on the edge of the bed.

"I know, but I just can't help myself. There is something I know from my time with is that you are not Edward's mate, so there will be someone down the line who you will love even more than anyone else. When that time comes you're going to want to leave Edward so bad, but at the same time you don't want to destroy the family, You're going to have to make decision between your happiness and everyone else's. That's what I've chosen and, trust me, it's not fun, you get no satisfaction from the thought of keeping the peace." With that Jasper stood up and got into the shower. I did not join him this time. I got dressed and we drove home in silence as I put this past week behind me and focused on Edward coming home and my upcoming wedding. Deep breaths, but despite myself, whenever I was alone, I still thought of us, Jasper and I sneaking around and having the times of our lives.

The wedding was cute and no one ever suspected anything happened between Bella and I. Jacob gave his blessings and practically made Bella cry which made me want to rip his throat out and everything was perfect. Well, for everyone else that was. I pretended, which I found myself doing more, and more often these days, I smiled when I was suppose to and did what everyone else expected of me, but when Alice wanted to break the bed I found my not in the mood, ever. I watched Edward and Bella get into the car and drive away together, newly weds going to a romantic island and I wished it was me instead of Edward with her.

Esme Island, I was blow away that the Cullens owned an entire island, but I was one of them now and it could only be expected of them. The first thing we did when we got there was set our bags down and then have sex. It was Edwards first time and I had to pretend it was mine to and I found myself thinking of Jasper's name when I climaxed. I found that if I closed my eyes then I would see Jasper loving me instead of his brothers and everything was much better until I had open them once more and see that Jasper was replaced.

"What is wrong with you Jasper? Why don't you love me?" Alice asked one night and I couldn't hold back my sigh, she could be so aggravating sometimes. "Answer me Jasper!" She demanded.

"I don't love you Alice, there, is that what you wanted to hear? Hmm? You're not my mate and you constantly get on my nerves and I can't stand it anymore!" I then made a split second decision. "I'm leaving Alice, and don't try to follow me." I then started to pack as Alice followed me around blubbering about how much she loved me and all her lies. Once I had filled up a suitcase with money and clothing I got on my motorcycle and rode away, not looking back. I couldn't believe I said that to her, but I knew it was going to come out at some point, I just never thought I'd really be able to say it. Now, there was one thing I couldn't do though, which was confess my love publicly to Bella. She was the one I thought of constantly, but at the moment I had to get away. I drove, doubling back and making sure they wouldn't be able to find me, I made myself a new identity and settled in a small town on the western coast of Oregon. I bought a little house that I liked much more than the mansion we had, it was all very unnecessary in my mind. Every night all I thought of was Bella, feeling her soft skin underneath my fingers and hearing her melodic voice in my ears. I decided that because I was starting new, I might as well try something new as a change and so I took up cooking, getting a job at a local bar and grill. It was weird because I couldn't taste the food, but that was only a challenge and I was built to face challenges, it was a slow moving process, but every day I was getting better at the culinary arts.

"Donoven!" Someone from the front of the store yelled and I immediately looked up, wondering why my name was being yelled, in the six months that I've lived in Oregon and worked here, I had never been called out for anything. To my relief, it was only one of my friends I had made, he was a waiter and occasionally came into the kitchens to chat and give me tips when cooking.

"What James?" I asked, continuing my work.

"Nothing, I just felt like yelling your name." I scoffed, rolling my eyes at his friendly jab.

"Christ, I swear James, you're going to get me fired."

"You seem to being a pretty good job with that yourself with the shit you're shoveling out." He said laughing.

"Please, I'm learning, have some compassion!"

"Compassion's for the weak! Anyway, I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me and a couple guys for drinks after work?" James asked and I really didn't have anything else to do, seeing as I never slept. It would also be nice to taste modern liquor, the last time I had tasted any kind of alcoholic drink was before I was a vampire and that was homemade moonshine.

"Sounds good to me, my shift's almost over anyway." I quickly wrapped up the last of my orders and hung up my apron, going outside to meet James and two other guys.

"Donoven, this is Hose and Hank, they will be joining us tonight."

"Okay, are we walking James?" I asked, wondering just where we were going.

"You guessed it, do you really think any of us can afford a car or fit onto your motorcycle?" James asked with a slightly chuckle and I just shrugged my shoulders, lighting a cigarette. We walked and kept walking until we reached the woods. I noticed that everyone seemed pretty tense and could feel the aggression growing in everyone, something was off. As we started walking into the woods I started to get nervous for the others sake, if they tried to hurt me, I'd kill them, without hesitation.

"Are you sure the bar is this way?" I asked James and all he did was nod. We walked for about twenty minutes more before we reached a clearing where you could see all the stars in the sky, this is where we stopped.

"James, this isn't funny, where are we?" Suddenly thee two guys turned around to face me and took out guns, pointing them directly at my chest. "You don't want to do this, trust me." I said, thinking only momentarily how cliche it all was.

"Oh, trust me Donoven, we do." He said, pulling out a butterfly knife and twirling it around naturally. James walked towards me calmly, holding his knife in a defensive position, but I didn't whimper, I stood my ground and my eyes never left his.

"You're a brave one, but it's not going to save you." James said, only inches away from me, took his knife and jabbed it into my side. Instead of crumbling on the ground and dying like everyone expected me to, I just took the knife out and through it into a tree nearby. Their eyes widened, fear blossoming in their soul when they realised they had seriously fucked up.

"I told you, you didn't want to do that and now you're going to have to die." It was only a split second before I pounced, going slower than I normally would just to give them a 'chance'. I drained the first guy and went for the next. After, James had ran off so I tracked him and drained him on the edge of the woods, I really thought I had made a friend, but I guess not.

I knew I had to leave after that and so I packed up and moved to Los Angeles, pretending to be a culinary student at a college which always nice. I decided to be extra careful because I did want to finish my degree in the culinary arts, which was about two years. To fit the part I started wearing flannel shirts and skinny jeans with bennies, which I had grown quite fond of, looking to be about twenty five. Over time I started to like my look and decided not to change it, even if I moved away. One night I was laying in my bed, thinking, and like always, Bella popped into my head and I was wondering what she was doing. I always wondered what she was doing, but I couldn't pluck up the courage to go back to Washington to see her.

I now had a degree in culinary arts, which was pleasing, I could now work in upscale restaurants, but for the time being I decided it was time to go see Bella. I packed a couple things and hopped onto my bike like I did only two and a half years prior, going in the opposite direction. It was nice to see familiar landscape and feel the cooler temperatures of the great pacific northwest, but my nervous grew with every fraction of a mile and I almost turned around a couple times. When I got to Forks I knew I didn't have to try and change my scent, over the time I was gone, my scent had evolved and may be slightly similar to what it was, but I doubt anyone would think twice about it. I got a room at a motel, one that Bella and I had never messed around in which was hard to find in Forks. I decided to walk to the house, I wanted to see if everyone was there and observe their schedules before I just knocked on the door. I sat in a tree for an entire twenty four hours, but for some reason, I never saw Bella, Edward or Alice, hopefully Bella wasn't gone. I decided the next day to do what I said wasn't and just go and knock on the front door.

"Jasper?" Esme breathed when she opened the front door, and before I knew it she was squeezing the life out of my undead body. "I missed you so much," she said, "a lot has happened in your absence." I wondered what she could be talking about, but I didn't ask her about it, knowing she'd tell me sooner or later. She invited me inside and we sat down on the couch, to my surprise, Carlisle, Emmett, and Rose were there to.  
"Where did you go Jasper?" Carlisle asked in his usual calm voice.

"Culinary school in California, I wanted to do something knew and I wanted to get away and so I did." There was no point in lying to them.

"We missed you." Rose said, looking slightly pissed, but still feeling relief.

"I know-" I heard someone coming down the stairs, drawing my attention away from the conversation at hand. It was Bella. The only thing was, she didn't look like Bella, she had a white blonde buzz cut and two black lip piercings, she also had two golden eyes, she was vampire. Behind her was a small boy who looked to be about six with curly blond hair and deep hazel eyes, the weird thing was that he kind of looked like me.

"Bella.' I said shocked, I had thought she was gone with Edward and Alice.

"Where's Edward and Alice?' I asked, looking back at the others.

"They're gone Jasper." Bella said from behind me, walking up to one of the out lying couches and sitting down, the small boy following behind. "During Edward and I's honeymoon we found out that I was pregnant and everyone went crazy, no one knew it was possible," explains the child, "well, when Miles was born I died and so Edward turned me, but something was… off. Miles didn't look like Edward at all, as you can see, he looks just like you. They quickly figured us out and when I woke up both Alice and Edward were gone. That was only three months after you left. That is when I realised that you were my mate and being without made me not want to go on, the only thing keeping me alive really, was Miles, Miles Cyrus Cullen. He's your son Jasper."


End file.
